Many things can happen in our lives to trigger a confidence crisis. Filing an exam, losing a job or a valued relationship, losing that business order. You simply loose deeply confidence in yourself. Even handling small things is an hard topic. How to rebuild self confidence has a lot to do with taking back control of yourself and your life.
So, how do we do it?
How to Rebuild Self Confidence by Overcoming Failure
An old adage says that you cannot win always. Setbacks are part of life. However, there is a way to have always a winning attitude to whatever happens.
First, deal with your mistakes. What I did right? What action turn things wrong? Learn what happened, and make sure you recognize the same situation next time, so you’ll manage it better.
Second, understand that the truth is that there is no failure: there are only results. Focus on what could have gone worse. Well, these are resources you didn’t lost.
Focus on these resources and imagine how you could leverage them to restart from where you are now.
Moreover, there is no failure, there is only learning; focus on what did work and what didn’t, so try to imagine what could have worked more effectively. This is what you could do your next time.
Finally, sleep over your failure. And restart tomorrow from your refreshed resources and your new learning.
Overcoming failure is the essential cure for self-confidence. But sometimes to be sure to go through it, you must add resilience, so you’ll be able to persist through very hard times until things will become better.
How to Rebuild Self Confidence by Letting Go of the Worry and Get Control Back
If you can’t fail, your next step is having your power back. This means refocusing on what you have control.
First, exploit your comfort zone. Focus on the subjects over which you have control and reduce your exposure to events over which you have little or no control. Monitor your internal dialogue, and silence the negative voice that keeps criticizing you.
Second, stop wasting your energy on things that can go wrong.
A way to do this is to think about the worst thing that could possibly happen. Then accept that it could happen. And then accept that even if it will happen, you’ll survive it, it won’t be the end of the world and you’ll go on.
If you are in trouble doing this, a supporting strategy is to visualize the situation that worries you. Focus on the points the bother you and think of people who have successfully crossed these hurdles. If you don’t know anyone, just imagine someone getting over this troubles. Imagine what they are doing, and what they are thinking to behave that way. Then think of yourself as someone who is thinking the same way with confidence, and is ready to take up the challenge. This is a smart exercise that triggers real profound resources you have. Learn more about it in my post about subpersonalities.
Make this a habit. You will find that you too can overcome these obstacles.
If worry and anxiety are for you an issue after failure, then check my post about “How to Boost Your Self Confidence When Anxiety Keeps You Down”
How to Rebuild Self Confidence by Rebooting Your Positive Thinking
You can’t have a confidence crisis if you don’t have negative thoughts that keep you in doubt with your skills and your abilities.
A good way to dispel doubt is to flood it with the many positive things around you. The more you focus on them, the more this will work.
A way to do this is to maintain a diary, and note down all positive things that happen during the course of the day. You will be surprised to note the number of positive things that are happening around you, which you missed earlier.
See what’s positive around you and repeat to yourself every day that you are getting better at what you do, and feel the difference.
What do you think?
Reframing failure, getting control back and reshaping your positive thinking will get you back on track.
So, think when you had in the past a loss of confidence, but then you were able to get it back. What happened? Share this with us by commenting this post or contacting me.
Also discover how you can boost your confidence and develop your courage with our 30 days self confidence challenge. Just sign up in the form below.
Did you miss something?